Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Randomize