Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
