i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
Randomize
