Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
I skipped work to stalk him.
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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