Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Randomize
