Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
