Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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