capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
He did a backflip because drugs
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize