Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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