Who wears a wallet chain?!
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
