Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
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