And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Randomize
