I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Randomize
