Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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