before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
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