So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
...
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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