We got so high we made milksteak
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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