in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
