i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Randomize
