Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Come on in and take your pants off
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