sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I accidentally burped into my bong.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Why did my mother make you get naked?
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
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