Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Randomize
