soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
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