I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
you didnt know i had herpes?
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize
