Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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