i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
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