problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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