He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
Randomize
