I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
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