So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
