my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize
