Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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