Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
Randomize
