Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
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