WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
Randomize
