Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
the raccoons are back...
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