You're my little dorito
Define "chronic" masturbator.
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
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