So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
Randomize
