I got chris browned last night
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
