Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize