I am puke
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Randomize
