direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
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