Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
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