I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize