Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
Drunk is not a location!
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
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