speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
