The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize