so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
