You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
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