I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
